Track Meet at Nekoosa

Updates to the spot guide

I updated the spot guide with a few new spots, and I added lines showing where any road spots go to (approximately).

A Gas Station... offering ice

Senior Salute Answers

What are your plans next Fall?

I will be attending Big Sky Bible Institute in Montana. BSBI is basically a one year Bible study course, and while I'm out there I am sure that I will be doing plenty mountainboarding, mountainbiking, and most of all... skiing.

What is one thing you have taken away from youth group that will help you prepare for life after high school?

This is pretty tough question to answer. I'm not sure if it is so much of one thing as it is a way of life. Plumbline has been one way that I make my relationship with Jesus Christ not just a once a week deal, but that I integrate Him into my everyday life. Plumbline has helped me do that, be helping me reorient my thoughts to Christ throughout the week, as I'm easily distracted.

I'm not sure if that's what I intended to say. But in a nutshell, Plumbline isn't just one thing, it is more of a way of life. One thing I do know, though, is that I want to be at least partially involved as a youth leader in some youth group down the line. I doubt that means as a youth pastor, but I'm most definitely going to try to be there for the next generation as much as Alan, Heath, Dean, and others have been for me.

How do you plan to continue to grow in your faith?

Well, I'm attending a Bible Institute for one thing. Beyond that, I want to continue to strive to make my quiet times the most important part of my day. But basically, I want to do with my life whatever it is God wants me to do with it. I want Him to be at the center of everything I do. Its easy to say, but so much harder to do. My goal is to have that become how I live: with God at the center. I know that isn't the way it is right now, but maybe some day with His help, it will be.

Any words of wisdom to pass along to the rest of Plumbline?

Life is short. You may not realize it now, but your high school days will be over before you know it. So here's my advice: live more. Try more things, even if you think you won't like them. Step outside of your comfort zone into new experiences. Bend or break the rules a little more often, live a little... you don't have to always worry about the consequences. I'm not saying you need to go and find out if meth is as addictive as everyone says it is: use a little common sense, but don't feel restricted by society's expectations. Basically, get out there and grab life by the horns. You're going to get out of life what you decide to put into it. Get a lot out.

The Visage of Winter :: Old Randomer

The Visage of Winter

By: Goo (Gregory Heil)
Written: October 2005

One day
the scrape of metal edges
over a slope of glazed ice,
and the roar of the lift
as it tirelessly ascends the mountain.

The next day
unutterable silence
of sparkling-white, untracked powder
below the outstretched arms of the native inhabitants,
which are adorned with priceless jewelry of white.

This got published at aspectjournal.com and you can check it out by clicking here. Alternatively, the link is: http://www.aspectjournal.com/stories/jones_heil_verse.html

Yo-yo :: Old Randomer

Yo-Yo

By: Goo

Written: 10/10/05

Check this out. It was up on Mrs. Schreiner’s board and it has to be pretty much the worst joke ever:

Did you hear about the freighter bound for San Francisco with a cargo of yo-yos that got caught in a violent Pacific storm? It sank 42 times.
-Leon Baden

That is so dumb! I can come up with a better joke than that...

Live Life on the Edge :: Old Randomer

Live Life on the Edge.

By: Goo

Written: 9/28/05

Ok, so in English class today Mrs. Greschner was asked a question about a picture that hangs upon the wall of her classroom. It depicts a group of students sitting on top of a cliff with their legs dangling over the edge. And one of her comments went something like this: “It is a neat picture, but don’t ever do anything so foolish and dangerous!”

Foolish and dangerous? I can recall doing the exact same thing with my dad at the age of 5! In fact I enjoy sitting on the edge of a cliff, relaxing, possible taking a water break whilst mountainboarding, or something of that nature. Now, that brings up something else. To me, my average everyday life is more dangerous than that. From skiing to snowboarding to mountainboarding to mountainbiking... I mean I must just lead a foolish and dangerous life! Honestly, it just astounds me how timid some people are. Or maybe it’s just me. Maybe I just belong to a group of foolish people. Or MAYBE, I can’t stand living life conforming to other people’s standards of safety. Maybe I just like living life on the edge.

Zanzibarbarians, and Even More Aroused Apes! :: Old Randomer

Written by Ben (previously on Randomer):

Zanzibarbarians, and Even More Aroused Apes!

Byshakka (Ben)
9/10/05

About Me

What's your full name? Benjamin Joseph Conner

Nickname? Conner, Connerman, Stacheman, Forsken

What do you prefer to be called? Conner

Age? 16 for a few more weeks

Do you look your age? not with my stache

DOB? October 7, 1988

Do you share a b-day with anyone famous? not to my knowledge

What color are your eyes? hazel

Hair color? brown

Height? about 6' I think

Weight? i dunno, about 170, 180

Do you think you can afford to lose weight? maybe but i'd rather eat

Are you straight, bi, gay? straight

School? Neillsville High school

Grade? 11

Pets? 3 cats, a rabbit, some fish

City You Live In? Neillsville

Live at home? ya

How many people do you live with? 4

How many brothers and sisters do you have? 1 sister and 1 brother

Do you like your parents? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA you all know the answer to this one

Are you happy? sometimes

Do you wear necklaces, bracelets, anklets, earrings, or/and rings? no, just a watch

What colors are you wearing right now? green and black(just got off work)

What color is most of your clothes? white

Do you blow-dry your hair? no

Where's the weirdest place you've been? i dunno

Do you have your own car? no

What makes you unique in your own opinion? Zanzibarbarians!

Name your worst quality. don't know

Name your best. no idea

What would you like to do with your life? physicist. More math!

Say one thing about yourself you've never told anyone. I can't think of anything offhand....

Boredom level (1-5). right now about a 3

Put a number next to the following in the order of importance, 1 being the most important.

Family- 7

Friends- 1

Money- 1

Shelter- 1

Food/Water- 1

Fun- 1

Drugs/Alcohol- 60

Life- like living? 4

Favorites

Favorite song? Liberi Fatali

Favorite movie? Star Wars Episode 3

Favorite pastime? friends and video games

Favorite vacation? my parents gone and me home

Favorite color? green

Favorite food? this is irrelevant, i don't have a favorite

Favorite restaurant? Hardee's cuz you get more food on your burger

Favorite mall? i dunno, they're kinda all the same

Favorite animal? dragon

Favorite actor/actress? Burnie from Roosterteeth

Favorite band/singer? evanescance

Favorite radio station? 92.7

Favorite TV show? Stargate Atlantis

Favorite day of the week? saturday

Favorite quote? "Speak your name, you who profane the light."-Famfrit

Favorite number? 666

Favorite cookie? cooked, preferably

Favorite soda? Mountain Dew

Favorite chocolate bar? Hershey's cookies and cream

Who is your favorite care bear? they all suck

Favorite color of post-it note? there's different colors?

Favorite card game to play? Magic:The Gathering

Favorite cereal? something with sugar in it

Favorite weather? pouring rain

Favorite berries? blueberrys

Favorite show growing up? Ducktales

Favorite song based on lyrics? Connected

Favorite song based on music? Liberi Fatali

Favorite poem? I hate poems

Favourite drink? Mountain Dew

Favorite movie when you were 10 years old? I don't remember, probably star wars

Favourite animated movie of all time? Bardock: the Father of Goku

Where is your favourite place to go? inside of my head

Favorite website? rvb.roosterteeth.com, www.vgcats.com, www.hogwartslive.com, www.magicthegathering.com

Favorite thing about winter? no allergies

Friends/Relationships

Do you have a bf or g/f? no

Do you have a crush? obviously

If you could use three words to describe your b/f or g/f? don't have one

You go to your b/f-g/f's house for the first time and in his/her room, and everywhere is... you. What do you think? well, this defies all logical parameters

Your bf/gf gets drunk at a party. In their state of drunkenness, they babble about that one time they fooled around with someone else while you were together. They wake up the next morning with a slight memory that did something stupid. What do you do? cease speaking to them

Would you ever leave little notes to your g/f-f? i doubt it

Would you ever date someone outside of your social group? i dunno, ask me if it happens

Could you be called a Kinky person, a Hidden Kinky person, or an old fashioned person in bed? Why would anyone answer this?

How many ex-b/f or ex-g/f? 1

What's the largest age difference between you and someone you've dated? um, 10 months i think

(Guys) how would you feel if you gave a girl a flower? embarassed

(Girls) how would you feel if you got a flower from a guy?

(Guys) your g/f has long beautiful hair, which you love, she comes to school the next day with a short crop cut. What do you HONESTLY think? Okay, whatever

(Girls) your b/f has hair you love. He comes to school the next day with a shiny head. What do you HONESTLY think?

If you could be in a relationship with anyone right now, who would it be? I bet you would all love to know.

What’s your idea of a perfect date? i dunno

Have you experienced it? if i don't know, then i can't have experienced it

Say you saw a really hot guy/girl at school one day and you had no idea who he was, would you talk to him/her? not unless they made first contact

What would you say to "break the ice"? here, use this icepick

Have you or would you ever do anything more than kiss in a public area? this is getting R rated fast

What's the kinkiest thing you've ever done with someone else? that chair thing at kerins where shelly attempted to take my seat

Who’s your best friend? um, probably caleb

Which 5 people do you trust and are open with the most? i don't trust anyone

You have this uh, erotic dream about your friend of the opposite sex. How do you act and feel around that friend the next day? same as any other day

At one point in a girl/guy friendship one of them will like the other even if it's only for a little bit. True or false? i dunno, true?

What's a happy memory of a time you've spent with the opposite sex? i dunno

If someone said you were hot, what would you think? i knew someone in the world did!

(Girls) what's something about guys you don't get?

(Guys) what's something about girls you don't get? why they take offense so easily

What's one look trait that attracts you to a guy/girl? i dunno

What's one personality trait that attracts you to a guy/girl? once again, i don't know

Which guy/girl do you wish to be with RIGHT now? that would be telling

Is it right to flirt if you have a b/f-g/f? no

Would you rather go ballroom dancing or square dancing? don't kare

Ever experience unconditional love? no

What's your opinion on love? what's yours?

What does love feel like to you? Isn't love already a feeling?

Do you love anyone? maybe, maybe not

This or That

Vanilla Ice THEN, or Vanilla Ice NOW? there's a difference?

Silver or Gold? silver

Zebras or Leopards? leopards

Zebra skin coats or leopard skin pants? how about jeans

Are candles romantic or a fire hazard? FIRE!

Letter or E-Mail? what, me write? e-mail

Buttons or Boxes? push da button

Florida or California? earthquakes or hurricanes? why? how about a nice disaster free zone?

Would you rather eat sandwiches or pasta for the rest of your life? pasta

Would you rather be married in Venice, Italy, or Honolulu, Hawaii? don't care

Waffles or Pancakes? either, they're the same

Football or Rugby? football

Hat or Visor? hat

Ice Skating or Rollerblading? ice skating

Pizza or Burgers? burgers

Do you stay in bed thinking or do you fall asleep in 5 seconds? I always stay up for like an hour thinking

Would you rather go to a boarding school, private school, or an all girls/guys school? how bout an all girl school where i'm the only guy? chachacha

Chalk or Crayons? crayons

Coffee, or tea? yuck

Sun or Moon? moon

School/TAFE/UNI? Que? No comprendo

Raining Days or Sunny Days? rain

Glass Half Empty or Half Full? all empty

Winter or Summer? winter, summer, they're the same, just one's warmer

Autumn or Spring? allergies all around, wow, what a choice

Dog or Cat or Fish? cat

Pool or Hot Tub? neither if possible

Shower or Bath? shower

Snail Mail or E-Mail? didn't they already ask this?

Phone or Letter? ugh, talking or writing

White Chocolate or Milk Chocolate? white chocolate

Cake or Ice Cream? both at once

Other

Which do you think would have the most interesting outcome after interbreeding- Llamas and pandas OR ostriches and prairie dogs? i don't think that's possible

If you believe in reincarnation, what would you come back as in your next life? a rock with teeth

What is your lucky number and why? 7777, because thats the best HP value on FF7

How many CD’s do you own? 2 or 3

What would your perfect day consist of? a lot of sleep and Halo and food

Have you ever lied to get off the phone or out of talking to someone on line? no

Have you ever written a survey? no

How about a song? no

Or maybe a poem? did i not previously state I hate poetry?

Do you read your horoscope? sometimes

If so, do you base your day on it? no

What is the best present you've ever given someone else? well, i gave my sister Pokemon saphire

What is the best present someone else has ever given to you? that's a good question

Do you like having your picture taken? CAMERA'S STEAL YOUR SOUL!

Have you ever done a photo shoot, professional or non? no

If you could go anywhere in the world where would you go and why? Zanzibar. It has 2 z's in its name

Who would you take with you on this little adventure? heheheh wouldn't you like to know

What would you say is the most daring thing to do in a lifetime? join the army

Would you ever do that? not likely

Have you ever done crossword puzzles? yes

Ever actually completed one? several

Pick up the closest book and write a sentence at random from it? Is it the Black Man? asked Pearl.

Have you ever tried to analyze your own dreams? no

Would you put up posters in your room? yes

Can you sing? if i want to

Ever been in an airplane? yes

If so where were you flying to? around marshfield

How many surveys have you filled out this lifetime? enough

Name one person your life is made better by? can't think of any offhand

If you could only talk to one person online who would that be? not kerin cuz she blocks me

What famous person dead or alive would you interview if you had the chance? Ghengis Khan

Which movie can you watch and say the lines along with the actors? none

Name one of your passions in life? video games

Write one sentence stating what you want people to say about you after you've passed on? Conner was a sexy beast.

How fast can you run? fast enough to outrun most people if I have to

What one thing would you change in your life if you had the power to do so? I would be too sexy

Describe the ideal superpower and what you would do if you had it. flight. It's obvious what i would do with it. FLY! DUH!

When you’re talking do you ever use your hands to do quotation marks in the air when saying certain words? yes

Ever seriously questioned your sanity? no

What is the strangest thing you've ever done? i dunno

What is the worst thing anyone could ever do to you? make me live as a minor at home forever

Are you a fast typer? moderately

Ever been to a farm? yes

Tell me about your dream last night. okay, i was fighting aliens with a pistol that turned into other guns

Ever seen a shooting star? i dunno

Have you ever written anything on your skin? yes

If so what? tienes un raton grande en tus pantalones

Describe the nicest thing anyone has ever done for you. nice?

Ever looked directly at the sun? probably

Who do you miss? no one

Name something you just can't forget no matter how hard you try. nothing

If you woke up one morning and found out you were going to stay in the body you have now for the rest of your life, what would you think? can I be immortal too?

What’s something someone's done to make you hold a grudge against him or her? came into existence

If you had the chance to slow down your growth now and live to 500 years but it's like a 50 year old body by then, would you go for it? yes

There's a high school that'll be on a cruise ship and you have the opportunity to go. It's your last year at school. Do you go for it? depends who comes with

Who do you want to take with you to the prom? How many ways can you rephrase: who do you like?

Wouldn’t you just love to hug someone right now? hehehehhe yes

Who do you wish you could kiss? read 2 questions back

Wanna live in a castle? oh yes

Do you talk to yourself? yes, in spanish

If you could go on the show BECOMING, who would you become? never seen it

What song would you do? i don't sing

Ever gone to the mall/movies just to hang out? with these gas prices?

Write the first thing that pops into your head: zanzibarbarians!

What’s the funest trip you've been on? student council retreat

Would you really stand up and walk out on me? i don't know you, why would i stay

What's the most embarrassing thing you have ever done? i dunno

Do you believe in God? most of the time

How many e-mail addresses do you own? 1

Would you ever go to the shops in your pj's? no!

What are three things you wish for? flight, a portal to another magical world, a girlfriend

If you won a million dollars but were forbidden to spend it on yourself on anything frivolous, how would you spend it? buying political favors

Who do you think plays the most significant role in your life? me

Do you like the person who sent this to you as a friend? sure, i guess

More than a friend? no

Say one nice thing about the person who sent this to you. i like your couches and tv

Is there something that you would like to tell the person that sent this to you...Or the people that you are going to send this to? Uds. tienen muchos ratones mas grandes en tus pantalones!

The Creation of the Universes :: Old Randomer

Previously on Randomer (written by Ben):

The Creation of the Universes

Byshakka
10/7/05

The creator of the original universe is, for the purposes of the narrative following this point, referred to as The Overlord. He created the angels, the humans, the demons, everything. After several thousand years, a problem had developed. You see, every time a human began to believe in a “god”, that “god” was actually created, and after 5000 years there were quite a few of them crowding up heaven. Some of them, with a lot of human worshippers, were quite powerful. Anyway, The Overlord needed some way to get rid of them. After some thought, he decided to hold a contest. There were 3562 gods, so he created that many universes other than his own. Each god was given a universe, as well as several lesser angels and demons to command. As long as the god could keep its beings alive and the planets from being destroyed, they stay alive. If your people all die or your planet or universe is destroyed, you vanish from existence. This was 2010 years after the death of The Overlord’s son…..

-Excerpt from The Book of The Overlord, Vol. 19, scribed by Kael.

And the rest will follow :: Old Randomer

“...And the Rest Will Follow”

Goo
9/27/05

The new Project 86 CD, “...And the Rest Will Follow,” releases today... and I am so stoked! To date, Project 86 has released six songs off of their album at purevolume.com/project86 ... and they’ve all been awesome! Most notably, “Necktie Remedy” is just an absolutely stellar song! It is just amazing. Amazing. I am so excited about this release, it’s not even funny. More excited than I was about Still Remain’s “Of Love and Lunacy,” than Disciple’s self-titled release, than Haste the Day’s “When Everything Falls,” than Kids in the Way’s “Apparitions of Melody,” than Thousand Foot Krutch’s “The Art of Breaking,” than Blindside’s “The Great Depression,” than Subseven’s “Free to Conquer, and even more than Staple’s “Of Truth and Reconciliation,” all of which were released earlier this year. The only one which may yet rival it is Demon Hunter’s “The Triptych.” It’s gonna be good.

Essence of the Turn :: Old Randomer

The Essence of the Turn

Goo
9-26-05

I haven’t mountainboarded in a while... and it’s really getting to me. I went mountainBIKING two days ago, but I haven’t boarded in, like, a week. I’m gonna have to go Tuesday or Wednesday, because I won’t be able to ride this weekend. There’s just something about carving up a dirt hill that is so individual to this sport. Sure, you can bomb hills on a mountainbike, but the essence of the turn is greatly diminished. It’s time to get down and dirty!

Mountainboarding Spot Guide

Update: this post has been superseded by this new post.

I've put together an interactive map with all the spots that I've mountainboarded. I've included a rating and a general description (in case anyone finds this useful).

Click here to view the mountainboarding spot guide.

Displaced Mullets Appear on Calendars :: Old Randomer

Displaced Mullets Appear on Calendars

Goo
9/23/05

When the manipulatives of the core power unit to the nuclear plant were adjusted, the descendants of these fools had an education in mullet displacement. Oh, they need help! They should have learned that the slope of the mullet is, in fact, greatly affected by their horoscopic calendar kit. Thankfully, for the good of the people, the warriors in the hoodies made sure to “take care” of their connections.

Bandits! :: Old Randomer

Written by Ben (previously on Randomer):

Bandits!

By: Ben.
Released: 6-6-05 Shakka and Cortan were riding North toward the village the goblins were attacking. Cortan was immersed in a thick spellbook.

“What spells do you know?” Shakka asked warily. Some of the apprentice mages were not well trained.

“Oh, I know fireball and heal,” Cortan said, not looking up.

“But any Silver Knight, myself included, knows those!” Shakka exclaimed.

“That’s why I’m researching lightning magic,” he responded, pointing at the book.

“Now if you’ll stop bothering me, I’ll keep researching.” He once again buried his face in the book.

Shakka continued riding in silence.

After a few more hours, they began to cross an open plain. A little ways across, Shakka saw a group of men gathered around something. As they got nearer, it appeared that the men were kicking someone on the ground.

Shakka pointed it out to Cortan. “We should go stop those men,” he said.

Cortan looked up. “We should stay out of their business, and we can’t afford to lose time on our mission.”

“I’m going to go stop them,” said Shakka.

“I’m not going to help,” replied Cortan.

Shakka ignored him and walked toward the men. When he got closer he could see that the men were kicking a young girl, about 10 years old.

“Pardon me,” Shakka interjected. “But I must ask you to cease your assault on this defenseless child.”

One of the bandits turned and looked at him.

“She can go as soon as she hands over them expensive jewels she’s carrying,” he said.

“If they are hers, then you will leave them in her possession,” Shakka told him.

“All right Mr. Knight,” said the bandit. “Either you leave, or we kill you. It’s five on one, so you will lose.”

Shakka turned and started to walk away. “Yeah, that’s what I thought!” roared the bandit. Shakka turned and looked at him. The bandit made a very rude gesture towards Shakka. Shakka pulled the pistol he had gotten and started shooting. Three of the bandits got caught by them immediately. The other two started running. One of them got away. The other got caught by another bullet.

“Thank you,” said the girl, bleeding from several gouges.

“How far are you from home?” asked Shakka.

“I live by those mountains,” she answered, pointing to some mountains a few miles

away. “I can get the rest of the way myself, don’t worry.” A few minutes later, Shakka and Cortan were on their way to the Stone Kingdom again.

I'm a Frozen Pizza Making Professional :: Old Randomer

I’m a Frozen Pizza Making Professional

By: Goo
Written: Last weekend.

I went to school and majored in the culinary art of frozen pizza making. Professor Yoda was my instructor. To quote the Prof. “Learned to make pizza, I did.”

One day in pizza class, we played boggle just for the heck of it. The Boggle game ended when somebody ended up spilling pepperoni all over the Boggle board. Unpleased was Yoda. Used the Force, did Yoda, to clean up the boggling pepperoni stains. (Pepperoni stains aren’t very common occurrences, which is why the Force was required to sanitize the Boggle cubes.

After the Boggle cube sanitization, Yoda proceeded to tell us to write a song about the finer points of crust darkening. He noted that all the best song lyrics have been written by someone who was either stoned, drunk, or both. I decided to take senor Yoda’s advice, and balanced a rock on my head while I tried to write a song. It went something like this:

la la la la...
I’ve got a rock on my head.
la LA!
it’s brown.
la LA!
it’s round.
la LA!
to dround.

I presented it to Yoda, but he said: “Off topic, that song is.”

I responded: “Sorry Professor Yoda, but all of that stoning and drounding and bounding have made me lose my volition to work on school work. So, if you don’t like my song, well, that’s too bad. Long live the SLACKERS!”

“Fail you will for your slacking,” he replied with a stern look on his green face.

“Geez,” I whispered to a fellow bounder, “He looks like he just had some Split Pea With Ham and Bean soup. That’s enough to make a Jedi Professor extra-special anti-bounder-tunes.”

As Yoda passed me by to leave the totally befuddled class in the classroom (which had the Red Barron’s Tombstone as the chalkboard) all by themselves (which means without a teacher), I caught a whiff of his pits. Bad it was. “Hey Yoda, you should really check out a little product called deodorant. Do they not have that on your planet?”

“Taunt me not, else hit you with a big stick I will.”

“Pee-u, Yoda needs a dog-who-poops-on-carpet deodorizer!” (After I said that, I realized I maybe went a little too far.)

“Retaliate with big stick, I will!” He yelled as he brandished his walking stick which was twice his height.

“OW, shouldn’t ‘ave done that,” I groaned as I slipped into a coma.

I awoke two days later to see Yoda leaning over me. “Ready, about pizzas to learn, are you yet?”

Chapter 1 of The Adventures of Sir Shakka: "Sir Shakka the Silver Knight" :: Old Randomer

Written by Ben (Previously on Randomer):

Chapter 1 of The Adventures of Sir Shakka:

"Sir Shakka the Silver Knight"

By: Ben

“I knight thee Sir Shakka. Welcome to the order of the Silver Knights.”

Shakka was 15, the youngest ever knighted into the order, but he was already 6 feet tall. The man who had knighted him, General Rafael, was a half a foot shorter. Both wore shimmering silver armor.

“It was an honor to serve as your squire,” Shakka told Rafael.

“You are very skilled,” replied Rafael. “It will not take long to find you an assignment. For now you are dismissed.”

Shakka left the throne room and walked down the hall of Silver Castle. Like most of the Knights, he had brown eyes and hair.

The Silver Knights were border guardians. Their country, Silvaria, went all the way around the world at the equator. They kept the wars of the Northern Hemisphere away from the peaceful South.

Shakka went to the castle armory. Now that he was a knight and not just a squire, he could have his own shield. He still had his longsword, so he did not need a weapon. For his coat-of-arms he chose a dragon with a set of lances behind it. The armorer also gave him a small pistol.

“If you get a mission which requires some sort of better firearm, come see me,” he told Shakka.

After that, Shakka went to his quarters and took a nap while he waited.

A few hours later, one of Rafael’s squires came and woke him.

“Excuse me sir,” he said. “General Rafael has just received a request for a Silver Knight and would like you to handle the mission. He is waiting in the throne room for you.”

The squire left to attend to other business. Shakka dragged himself up and walked toward the throne room. The castle was empty, as it had been a lot recently. The demand for knights was greater than the supply, so Shakka figured that was why he had been promoted at such a young age. He reached the throne room and entered.

Rafael greeted him, but looked worried.

“This type of mission would normally require a full squad of knights,” he said. “But it is also an emergency and you are the only one here right now. A mob of goblins have been attacking a village on the border of the Diamond Kingdom and the Stone Kingdom. Now, this would normally not be a problem, but one of the goblins is Grikto the Enlarged, and he has recently acquired a powerful weapon, the Big Sword. I will send an apprentice mage with you. Meet him at the front gate in 20 minutes.”

“Yes Sir!” Shakka said, happy to be on his first mission.

20 minutes later, Shakka was on his way north to Diamond Kingdom with an inept mage named Cortan.

The Assassination :: Old Randomer

Written by Ben (Previously on Randomer):

The Assassination

By: Ben
Written: 5/25/05

The young king was afraid. His advisors had discovered a plot to kill him. Worse, the assassin was the notorious Shakka the Half-Dragon, a criminal wanted in half of the world. The assassination was supposed to occur in two days, when the king was to give an audience to the public in honor of the Feast of Logic. The king had become very worried, but finally decided on a plan.

“I shall hire an assassin to protect me from an assassin,” he said to himself, thinking himself clever.

“Guards!” he called and his 15 personal bodyguards came running. “I wish to hire an assassin. Which of the inns in town would I be most likely to find a good one in?”

The guards led him to a disreputable part of the castle town, to a pub called Royalty’s Demise. The king saw the name and at first panicked, but, surrounded by his guards, he felt that he could not possibly be in danger.

In the pub, he asked the bartender, “Is there an assassin here?”

The bartender, who reeked of old cheese, looked at the king strangely, but pointed toward the back corner, where a man cloaked in a dark robe sat. None of his features were visible except for his right hand that held his mug of ale. The king sat down across the grainy table from him. The thought of the cloaked man’s eyes watching him from beneath the robe frightened him.

“What do you want?” the man said in a low voice like a lizard’s growl.

“I need you to assist me,” said the king, trying to overcome his fear of talking to an unknown man. “Can you kill someone for me?”

“Maybe,” came the reply.

The king growing bolder, said, “I need you to kill Shakka the Half-Dragon when he comes after me on the Feast of Logic. I will pay you 100,000 gold coins and provide you with a sniper rifle for your services.”

“It seems we have a deal,” the mercenary said, his hand reaching to shake the king’s.

Two days later, the king was to give his speech. Even with the assassin he had hired to give him protection, he was still afraid that Shakka might kill him. So he crept from his chamber to his courtyard, watching every shadowy side corridor with suspicion and fear. Finally, he reached the pulpit above the courtyard. He could see his assassin, still cloaked, on a far wall, peering at the gathering crowd through the scope of his rifle for the unmistakable reptilian features of a half-dragon. The guards at the gate were making all the people coming through the gate remove their headgear to see if they had scales. The timid king began to speak to the crowd, gaining confidence as he spoke.

After several hours of speaking and answering requests, the king saw the sniper suddenly become alert, appearing to track something. The king’s fear of Shakka came back. He ran to the edge of the pulpit and looked down. The sniper rifle fired—BAM—and the king felt the bullet enter his chest. The sniper he had hired had shot him. He looked toward the battlement where the sniper stood. The recoil of the gun had knocked off his hood, revealing the reptilian features of a half-dragon. The king fell back, tasting salty blood in his mouth, realizing that, in his own paranoia, he had given his enemy the opportunity to kill him. Then he died.

My Backpack Needs a Blinker :: Old Randomer

My Backpack Needs a Blinker

By: Goo

Written: 5/12/05

I’ll be walking down the halls of my high school, and I’ll come up beside someone who’s going slow. Really really slow, I mean, I just saw a slug pass her on the right she’s going so slow. I’ll look for a gap in the flow of people, and I’ll attempt to dart toward it, but I have to make sure to check oncoming traffic and cross traffic... it almost seems as if we all need to install blinkers on our backpacks so we can signal our intentions

(Signal our intentions... we should all wear light bulb sign things on our heads, and when some guy spots the hot chick going down the hall, his light bulb would go on and a little thing would say “My place, tonight?” I think it would make for a good laugh between classes, and in the classroom. Bored during a lecture? Your little head thing would go, “_____, this guy’s boring!” It’d be kinda like Inspector Gadget....” We could also paint lines down the hall, have separate lanes of traffic to help reduce collisions. In fact, they might as well give us all some of those handicapped electric wheelychair things. We could build the desktop right into it, so we wouldn’t need desks anymore....

Then, the hall monitors could run around with their sirens on their wheelychairs, pulling over students who are speeding. You would hear a “Weeeee....” and be like, “Ha! Caleb got pulled over for speeding again. He’ll probably get suspended.”

Now you’re thinking, “Electric wheelychairs, lame!” But, some of those wheelychairs have tires that are a whole ton beefier than the tires on my mountainboard! Some of those things would be awesome for offroading. ATV’s are entirely overrated, electric wheelchair for me!

A Commentary on Life :: Old Randomer

Canadia Rules

By: Goo
Written: 5/17/05

I experienced a curious thing today. During a class, the teachers deliberately tried to stir up political controversy, to have us formulate opinions and what not. What if our opinion doesn't fit with their opinion? What if we don't give a ****? What happens then? What if our opinion is that the system is all ****ed up? What then? What if we hate government in the first place? Why does all of this matter so much? Is it really necessary to decide what we should do about it? What can we do? A whole lot of not-too-much. I know what we should do. We should all move to Canada. Canadia rules.

High School English Squelches the Creativity of its Students :: Old Randomer

High School English Squelches the Creativity of its Students

Goo
5/6/05

I think high school English class (at least through the tenth grade) squelches the creativity of its students by focusing too much on the rules and not enough on the innovative thinking and creativity section of writing.

Instead of worrying about speling and punc.tuation and parenthetical notation (Me, Page 777) the teachers should worry more about conveying the idea that writing should be fun, that it’s about expressing your ideas in a way that other people can understand. It shouldn’t be about getting everything just so, it should be about learning how to be creative and inventive.

Sometimes I can definitely lack in that department, but at other times I get an A+. I think writing should be about conveying what you think, or sometimes about accurately presenting a specific event, or information about a certain topic. I believe that writing is about presenting your thoughts, feelings, and emotions in a way that other people can understand. Sometimes it’s through a story. Other times, it isn’t.

Regardless, English teachers such as Mr. Woracheck shouldn’t worry so much about the rules. They/he shouldn’t regard them as the be-all-and-end-all of life. Screw the rules. Be a rebel for once in your life. Why does everything always have to be the same? Answer: It Doesn’t!

End Rant.

The Allure of Mountainboarding :: Old Randomer

The Allure of Mountainboarding

Goo
5/6/05

I’m driving along, and I see a hill. I analyze it. I size it up. I look at what kind of terrain features it has on it. I think about mountainboarding.

Right now we’re at my grandparent’s house. Tomorrow, we’re planning on buying plants and wood chips and doing yard work in the morning and in the early afternoon, and then later on in the afternoon we’re going to go to a park around here that is supposed to have some excellent single track.

We’re in Red Wing, Minnesota.

If you don’t know anything about Red Wing, let me fill you in. It is right on the Mississippi river, and it has hills. Lots and lots of hills. Much more than central Wisconsin. There are hills everywhere, and several enormous cliffs/bluffs. So, everywhere I look, I think of mountainboarding.

I really want to spend time with my grandparent’s, but I am dreading the yard work tomorrow. Work, work for hours... with mountainboarding all around me, hills everywhere you look. Things you want to ride, but know you can’t, or shouldn’t. Knowing your parents and grand parents want you to spend time with them. Thinking about some possible awesome riding later on in the day. It is not going to be fun.

The place that I am planning on riding tomorrow is a pretty big hill. Actually, that’s an understatement. It’s one of the tallest spots around. Supposedly, it has some killer single track on it. Supposedly. We’ll find out. But, if it turns out to be less than ideal, I could always go road riding. The road up to the top (where there’s a sucky disc golf course with an awesome view) is all down hill, with several switchbacks. If my memory serves me its pretty long with a pretty good grade... the only drawback being the cars.

Well, I’ll get some riding in one way or another. I have to. I need to. I MUST DO IT. I need to go riding...

The Trampa, out at Levis

The Bike or Board Quandry

I've been struggling with several decisions over the past couple of weeks, most of which pertain to work, college, finances, and the relationship between the three. I'm not going to get into all of those at this point in time, but I have been able to make most of the decisions that I needed to. There is another decision, though, that I have not been able to make. In the eventuality that I have a scant few hours that are not already accounted for, which should I do: mountain bike, or mountain board? I know, I know, it is truly a trivial decision; yet it is one of the one's that I have the most trouble making.

Let me break it down for you. Mountainboarding is my first love, so often times I feel obligated to give it precedence over mountainbiking. But, I have not mountainbiked nearly as much as I have mountainboarded, so I end up viewing mountainbiking as a new challenge to be conquered. It isn’t that mountainboarding is no longer a challenge; it's just that I feel as if the terrain is no longer a challenge. I've been riding at Levis Mound for four years, and I feel like I know exactly where every single rock and root lies. Anyhow, I concluded that if I had new terrain to ride, I would definitely rather go mountainboarding.

Based on those criteria I decided to go mountainbiking last Sunday. There was only one section of single track that I had not yet ridden out at Levis Mound, and I decided that I wanted to ride it. Incidentally, there is a massive hill on it that looks ideal for mountainboarding. So as a result of making the decision to bike, I influenced my next several choices to the boarding side of things.

Those were the main arguments/criteria that went into my decision last weekend. Most of the time, however, there are several other factors that play a role into my general bike/board decision making; but as I was writing this I didn’t have time to entirely finish it, and now it seems complete enough. So ta ta for now!

Mountainboarding video, complete with Family Force 5

I randomly ran across this mountainboarding video: click here, and I thought I would throw it up here. The riding isn't that impressive, but it is set to a Family Force 5 song, so it is automatically a winner! Go check it out.

Blue Tires :: Old Randomer

Blue Tires.

Goo
5/7/05

Today I was supposed to go mountainboarding at what was rumored to be a super sweet spot. It was supposed to have huge downhill stretches of single track. Excitement number 1.

This place is on a decent size hill, that I’ve been wanting to mountainboard for quite some time. Excitements 2 and 3.

Later on in the morning before we were planning on going, I found out that they were supposed to have a decent jump section. As there is nothing in the way of freestyle jumps where I come from, that excited me all the more. Excitements 4, 5, and 6. Also, excitements 7 and 8.

But, we have to work all morning, doing stuff for my grandparents (which I didn’t mind so much) and doing stuff for my brother (which I minded more, but not too much), but I was thinking about mountainboarding during the entire expanse of time. Excitement factor reaches 9.

Finally we decide to leave. Excitement factor equals ten.

But, then my Mom (everyone goes “Ha, your mom.”) decides that she and my brother will tag along with me and watch. They turn out to be super annoying. Excitement factor decreases to 7.

We wander around for two hours trying to find stuff to ride. It didn’t help that we went the wrong way for the kind of riding I was looking for. We ended up searching for 2 hours and came up with next to nothing. Excitement factor decreases to 2.

Then, as we are coming back out, we meet a guy that claims that the mountainbikers “have crazy $#!+ everywhere” including “jumps and $#!+.” He gives us directions to a “teeter totter,” so we go to check it out. Excitement factor increases back to 7. There’s still some hope for some mountainboarding.

So we get where we’re going, and I find a couple of tracks that look to be a great ride. One was a super technical track that wound down through a gully, a drainage ditch of some sort. It had dead, rotting trees that were lying across it, like most of the gullies in this area, but in here they had been cut through just enough for one or two different sections of single track snake down through the severed trunks, rocks, and other debris. All of this was on a good slope, so speed control could definitely be an issue. (I don’t ride with a brake.) Down at the bottom there was a good drop that promised some airtime. The other run was a doubletrack that started off with a gradual downhill, then steepened up quickly and dropped out of site. It looked like a challenging ride, carving/powersliding most of the way down. Excitement factor has reached 12.

But, the only thing missing from the picture is that a piece of my binding had come off, and I tried to reattach it, but it was still very loose. Out of all the tools I have for on trail repairs, I do not have a screwdriver, the one tool I needed. So, we hiked around and looked, planning on going back to the vehicle to repair the board and then come back to let me do some riding. By the time we had hiked back out to the car, my Mom decided that it was time to go. Time to go? I hadn’t even gone mountainboarding yet! We’ve hiked around for 2 fricking hours, me dragging you along, not able to enjoy the solitude of the woods, and not even getting any mountainboarding or airtime in. And then, you have the audacity to even suggest that we leave after I find 2 excellent spots... 2 fricking excellent spots, that I could have spent at least 2 hours on each of them? What is this? You’re tired, because you just got done hiking for 2 hours. I thought you were the mountainbiking queen. I just got done, also hiking for 2 hours, in full pads, helmet, with a backpack and a mountainboard on my back, weighing in at least 25-30 pounds, sweating profusely the whole fricking time.

So we left. I ended up with such a bad case of blue tires, I had to mountainboard in the flipping parking lot of the store my mom decided to go to. When we got back to my grandparent’s, I ended up road riding on their flipping shallow hill/road near their house to get release. For about an hour and a half.

I have just suffered through a horrible case of level 12 blue tires. I’m still in pain.

Stinking Website :: Old Randomer

Stinking Website

By: Goo
Written: 5/10/05

Ay, I can’t seem to get a message board to work to my satisfaction. The SPhosting WWWboard has all those refresh problems, and the SPhosting PHPBB (or something like that) forum cuts out of the frame if you login. I knew I shouldn’t have used frames. Now I’m paying for it. I haven’t launched yet, I should just reformat. I could maybe just stick the menu in the iframe, and put the rest in the regular page. Maybe this, maybe that, maybe I shouldn’t do it at all... Grr wish my digi cam was working. Grr. Wish the website was coming along better. Grr.

The Red Chair :: Old Randomer

The Red Chair

By: Goo
5/6/05

So, I’m sitting at my grandparent’s house, sitting in an enormous, super plush, red leather chair. This chair must be about twice the size it needs to be, it must way a whole freaking ton, because the thing is huge and of such super supreme quality, this has to be one of the finest chairs ever.

Whenever I come here, I just love to sit in this chair. It is so comfortable, I could almost sleep in it, except it can get kinda sticky if you sit in one place for a while. It is so big and soft, you can just shrink into it and relax. It also has this delightful stool, same make as the chair, huge and super plush.

I think some of my internet correspondents from Kent would refer to this chair as “lush.” (England) (They mountainboard... therefore they rock.) (They also like hardcore music... double the rock factor.) I think that is a very sweet term, much better than sweet. It means the same thing as sweet, when sweet is used in the context of: “That is a sweet mountainboard.” At least, that’s how it seems to be used. Stinking English English, you can never figure out what those Englander’s are saying. I’ve heard it use to describe a run as “lush,” so I’m guessing it means the same thing.

This has to be the coolest spot to write or read ever. I have never read here, but I know a good reading spot when I see one. It also has a window to its back, so that would make it even better for reading.

I almost hope this chair gets warn out, so much so that they end up giving it away. Because, I might be able to get it then. This thing would be the best chair ever to play xbox in. If it wasn’t my grandpa’s, I’d swing my legs over the arm of the chair and use the other arm of the chair for a back rest (sitting across the chair, you see.) The arms are about seven arm width’s wide. I guess that depends on the width of your arm, but they are pretty big. They are wider than the average pillow is tall (the short way) and longer than the average pillow is long. They are approximately four length’s of my hand long, but that’s just my hand and that’s just a rough guestimate. (For your information, that is a word.) But, as it is, the foot stool should suffice.

5/9/05
Now that I think about it, I have read in that chair before. It ruled.

5/7/07 I just realized that in the first paragraph I used the wrong form of weigh. Actually, I found several mistakes in there. That's embarrassing... I hope I've improved over the past 2 years.

Why Frames? :: Old Randomer

Previously on Randomer:

Why Frames?

By: Goo
5/6/05

The first time you came to this site you probably went “Holy _________ it’s made out of frames.”

Ok, I enjoy website design a lot, but I wanted this website to be simple. I also wanted it to look half-ways decent, but still be simple. It also needed to be functional.

“Frames, functional?”

Yes. (I hope.)

“So, why did you use frames, again?”

Ok, just browse the site, and see how it looks. At this point in its design, it’s looking pretty dang snazy. Of course, I’m not done yet, but I’ve got my fingers crossed.

Basically, on this site I want to present my words/articles, not my website design.

Some shots from a ride back in March, I think

I'm 2 years old, going on 20!

My parents say that back in the day when I was 2, if someone would ask me how old I was, that I would respond "I'm 2 years old, going on 20!" Well I'm still not 20 yet, but as of today Randomer is 2 years old!! Randomer has moved twice and gone through some major transformations since last year (most notably the move to a blog), but it is still live and kicking (even if it's slightly subdued at the moment).

Other than being the 2 year birthday celebration, this also happens to be the March and April monthly updates. You're really getting a bargain with this email!

Mount Bohemia '07 Photo Gallery

Kevin, Eric, and I took a trip up to Mount Bohemia about 2 weeks ago. There are some pretty awesome pics in here.

A change of pace
Track begins.
I was so proud of myself for that run... but the other day I ran a 10 minute warmup, and then I ran for 75 consecutive minutes; a total of 7 and a half miles. 15 minutes straight doesn't seem like so much anymore.



All the Days I Mountainboarded in the Year 2006
Beginning to get amped up for mountainboarding...
last year I recorded every day I went out and where I went. Here's the list.



Days out Skiing, 07-08 Season
Every day I skied during the 07-08 season, and the location that I skied at.

Track and Mountainboarding both Commence, Cinnamon Dolce Lattes Continue
About track and mountainboarding.

Running like there's a Demon Chasing Me
More about track.

Kitty Experiments Bonus Episode
I didn't do it.

Real Recording
I got to record some real stuff up at WCCN.

Poserhawks; an informative lecture by Bubbs
Despite the fact that he is no expert, Bubbs delivers his indepth opinion of "poserhawks."

Wisconsin FINALLY has Winter!
It is no longer winter, but in early March we really got pounded with some snow.

Cessation of the Maelstrom

I was just thinking about writing, and about the fact that I have done virtually no writing since the advent of track. I enjoy writing immensely, and the lack of time to do it in makes me rather sad. In the months between the end of English class and the beginning of track, I felt like I was writing up a maelstrom. It all came to a sudden halt with track.

Going out for track seemed like an excellent idea at the time: I would get to participate in a team sport (just to say I'd done it), get in shape for mountainbiking, and get to vault myself into the air on a pole. In reality though, I never got to pole vault (I'm too big for the poles), running does not crossover to biking much at all, and the tiny bit of fun offered by the "team sport" aspect is not nearly worth the time commitment required.

And it is a huge time commitment! I have absolutely no time for anything anymore. My nights consist of one of the following:
1. Track Meet
2. Track Practice, then work
3. Track Practice, then Plumbline
So the only free time I have is on the weekend, and that is getting consumed by work and other mandatory activities. There is no time to write, there is only a very little time to mountainbike and mountainboard. But I've been working my tail off in track for a month and a half, and I'm not about to quit now.

A jump, earlier this year.

Metal Hubs, version 2

Downhill Deprived

I have been very busy and it has very severely affected the amount of time I’ve gotten to mountainboard. So severely, in fact, that I haven’t done any serious off-road riding this year. It’s April 27th for cripes sakes! My brain, my body, and my soul are telling me that I need to go and roll down some hills sideways.

This weekend I am going to get at least one long session of singletrack mountainboarding in, if not more. I need to get out there and get dirty. I need to get out there and get bloody! Yeah, I’m ready to ride!

Mount Bohemia '07 Photo Gallery

A Streetlight

The bottomside of my deck

PS I turned this in for a photography assignment a while back. My instructor said that it should have been cropped just a hair more to reduce some of the dead area (or something to that effect).

Days out Skiing, 07-08 Season

These are all the days that I skied last season... and I don't think there are going to be any more.

Skiing 06-07: 43 days

No Snow:
10/20/06 Back Yard
11/1/06 Levis Mound
11/5/06 Levis Mound
Snow:
12/9/06 Hiking: skiing at Bruce Mound
12/10/06 Hiking: skiing at Bruce Mound
12/15/06 Skiing at Bruce Mound
12/16/06 Skiing and snowboarding at bruce mound.
12/17/06 Skiing and snowboarding at bruce mound
12/22/06 Skiing at bruce mound
12/24/06 Skiing at bruce mound

12/26/06 Skiing at bruce mound
12/27/06 Skiing at indianhead mountain
12/28/06 Skiing at bruce mound
12/29/06 Skiing and snowboarding at bruce mound.
12/30/06 Skiing at bruce mound
1/12/07 Skiing at bruce mound
1/13/07 Skiing at bruce mound
1/14/07 skiing at bruce mound
1/15/07 skiing at levis mound
1/19/07 skiing at bruce mound

1/20/07 skiing and snowboarding at bruce mound
1/21/07 skiing at bruce mound
1/26/07 skiing at whitecap
1/27/07 skiing and snowboarding at bruce mound
1/28/07 skiing and snowboarding at bruce mound
2/2/07 skiing at bruce mound
2/9/07 skiing at bruce mound
2/10/07 skiing at bruce mound
2/11/07 snowboarding at bruce mound
2/16/07 skiing at bruce mound

2/17/07 skiing at bruce mound
2/18/07 skiing at bruce mound
2/24/07 skiing at mount bohemia
2/25/07 skiing at indianhead mountain
3/02/07 skiing at bruce mound
3/03/07 skiing at bruce mound
3/4/07 skiing at bruce mound
3/9/07 skiing and snowboarding at bruce mound
3/11/07 skiing at bruce mound
3/16/07 skiing at bruce mound

3/17/07 skiing at bruce mound
3/18/07 skiing at bruce mound
4/14/07 skiing at Mount Bohemia

It's early...

It's 1:48 AM right now, which you could tell by the timestamp, and I'm getting ready to head to Bohemia. It is also the 14th of April, which you could tell by the date thingy at the top, and I haven't skied in about a month. Now, I'm going to be skiing Bohemia for potentially two days. I hope I don't kill myself!

MBS

PS I turned this in for a photography assignment a while back.

Busy Schedulite

If you didn't believe that I was really busy with, well, pretty much everything... the fact that I haven't found time to put together a monthly update is a true testament to my business.

Here comes the sun

Running like there's a demon chasing me

Written 3/31/07.

I've decided that since I suck at track, that I am going to begin working out in the mornings before school. However, my morning work out will be more than just running. It will include a spiritual workout (devos), pushups, and crunches.

Today (Saturday) was my first time doing that morning workout. I was planning on mountainboarding or biking in the afternoon, but it just started raining harder than a diamond, so that pretty much put the kabosh on that idea.

Anyhow, right now I feel extremely downhill deprived. I really really really want to mountainboard. I also really really want to mountainbike, and I really want to run. The question is, should I run in the morning and board after church, or bike in the morning and still board after church, or... switch any of the options around whichever way you like. My basic problem is that I currently find myself without enough time for all of my sports, not to mention my writing. What do I do?

I settled on the bike before church and board afterwards option. I got a 21.5 mile bike ride in, but I froze my fingers off doing it. It rained pretty much all day, so I did not get a great deal of boarding in. When I did decide to try boarding, I got rained on again.